Mystic Makeda

The comedian Bernie Mac died this week at the age of 50. The comedian turn actor was considered one of the “Kings of Comedy”. Besides stand-up, he had his own sitcom which crossed racial and social-economic lines, and appeared in many movies over the years. He and I are the same age.

When I realized we were born in the same year I began to wonder why was I spared when I had complications after my surgery last year? What or who decides who lives and who dies?

I believe we all have exit points throughout our lives and at those points in our contracts, we can choose whether to continue on with this life or we can decide its time to go back ‘home’. As I look back over my life I see there were several close calls.

The last one I had was very profound and I remember making the decision to continue living. I had been hemorrhaging all day and most of the night when at about 6:00 am the rehab hospital I was in decided to call 911 to get me to a hospital better equipped to help me. I needed transfusions of blood and fast. The blood poured out of my body as fast as it was put in. I was tired and sick and knew the exact moment when I decided that no matter how sick and tired I felt, there was too much left for me to do. I had a loving family with a grandson on the way, friends and I had more work to do. I believed my ‘mission’ wasn’t over yet.

A year later I’m looking at my life and Bernie Mac’s life and I wonder, why was my life spared? He was famous, influential and rich. He had the means to touch people all over the world with laughter; his celebrity could open doors for him; his money could take care of his immediate and extended family; and he was able to do philanthropic work as well;  and then there is ME.

I had to catch myself because I was falling rapidly into the he’s ‘better’ than me mindset. His path was to do what he did and my path is to inspire people in my way. Although I get frustrated that my path isn’t as clear as I ‘assume’ his was, I realized that is a part of the journey. Learning who we are is the point. How do we learn what we are capable of if we are not put to the test? I may not ever be famous, globally influential and rich, and that is alright. We can’t grow if we are spending all of our time comparing what we have and who we are to others. I feel, like so many others in the country that Bernie Mac was taken way too soon, but that is his contact. The lesson for us is time is short and we don’t have the luxury of wasting any more time. Live each day as if it is your last and be comforted that when we do come to our last day, there are no regrets.

To life!

Namaste’